Monday, February 22, 2010

Big Brother Gets in Your Car

I just read an article about a school in Belfast, Ireland- St Matthews Primary- whose principal has asked parents not to wear pajamas ("pyjamas" over there) when dropping off their children. I saw this article in a few places and read through a hundred or so comments. Rather than dive into the cesspool of internet comment trolls, I thought I'd post my thoughts here.

I can sort of see his point. If parents are bringing the kids into the school, or checking them in, anything that involves getting out of the vehicle, then by all means appropriate attire should be worn. But if Mother-Of-Five is just pulling the car to the curb and offloading the little anklebiters, who the hell cares what she's wearing? And why would that be ANYBODY's business but hers?

Some common sense must be used. Obviously Mom would be embarrassed if she were in a fender-bender and had to leave the car or speak to police in her nightie, and same for Dad if he had to fix a flat tire in his boxers, but whose decision is that to make? Not the principal of the school. The kids attending have a dress code; their parents do not. (It can be argued that there should be one, considering the clothing some people choose to wear on inappropriate occasions, but that's a whole 'nother rant.)

Speaking of dress codes: this ball started rolling when Tesco in Cardiff banned shoppers from wearing sleepwear in their store. Over here in the United States, pajamas are de rigeur among the teen and college set. I was a bit put off by it myself, considering most of the so-called jammie bottoms were tight, folded down to expose more skin, and had words like TOO HOT and SEXY emblazoned across the butt. Wonderful clothes for the twelve-year-olds I usually saw wearing them. The older teens and college kids, not so bad, but I still wondered when it became socially acceptable to wear jammies anywhere outside the house. (Side note: I occasionally wore the funkiest jammies I could find to go grocery-shopping when I was younger, but back then it was a statement, not a trend!) Now some schools have a regular "PJ Day" that encourages this trend. Don't even get me started on the male butt-hanging-out thing. Why is this okay? No really, it's obscenity, not fashion. If I want to see asscrack I'll buy a magazine. I do NOT want to have a random stranger's intimate crevices forced upon my eyeballs.

Another, more recent trend is Public Snuggies. You know what a Snuggie is. Basically a fleece blanket with sleeves. People are now wearing them to bars, parties, etc. Sporting events I get, but bars? Really? The next cheesy pick-up line is "Hey baby, I really love that pink floral Snuggie, is there room in there for two?" (Yes they DO make double Snuggies, by the way.)

Back to the Pajama Mamas. And Daddies, so we don't stereotype. I realize there are many variables that influence someone wearing pajamas out in public. Some are ill and going to the doctor, some have just finished the night shift and changed clothes before dropping the kids off and then going home to bed, some have hectic mornings getting the children ready and plan to come back home to gussy up for the day, and a few people are- to be honest- just lazy/slobby/slutty, depending on the nature of the sleepwear. Any woman (or man!) who wears lingerie to drive the kids around is looking for attention of the sexual sort. Sweatpants and top? Meh, whatever. I've done that on rare occasions. Not my best look, but it's not a big deal. Nightgown with no shoes and no bra and nothing over it? Either she's having a really bad morning or she just doesn't give a damn. Regardless, if the kids are dressed and clean and at school on time, and the "offending" parent isn't waltzing around the building in a sheer teddy and garters, I say let 'em wear what they want.

This brings me (at last) to something I've mentioned to the husband on several occasions: Men With Hats. Back in the days of our grandparents and beyond, a man was never seen in public without a head covering, and ladies always wore hats to church and social functions. A man ALWAYS took his hat off indoors. It seems the only segment of the population still following this bygone trend is the military, who have strictly-enforced hat and uniform regulations. And maybe cowboys still do it.

I want to bring it back. There's something nostalgic and a bit romantic about a man tipping his cap to a woman, and a feeling of pride when everyone removes their hats for the display of our Flag (an event most commonly seen these days at NASCAR races.) I can take or leave the Carmen Miranda-bird's nest-Kentucky Derby extravagant ladies' hats of days past, but I do wish more women would wear great hats. I've semi-trained Hubby to take his hat off inside, although sometimes if there are a bunch of others wearing ball caps and we're at a gun raffle or something, I don't bother asking. But at my grandmother's house, in nicer restaurants, etc... hat off please.

And I'd like to see the days of the better-dressed gentlemen return, when belts and hats and shoes (not flip-flops) were considered the standard instead of exposed boxer shorts and undershirts worn as outershirts, or not at all. That's another thing I don't want to see, especially while I'm eating... armpit hair. Have the decency to cover that nasty mess when you're inside a restaurant. (Following the PJs in Cars logic, drive-through is fine.) Am I old-fashioned? Maybe a little bit. I'm also a bit hypocritical as well. If I'm going anywhere other than work, I will not leave the house without makeup and at least an attempt at getting my hair under control. My belly will not be hanging over my jeans and exposed from pubic bone to ribcage, nor will my asscrack be begging for someone to stick a quarter in it. At work, it's scrungy clothes and no makeup and hair under a hat. (If I had a job that wasn't so dirty ((as in DIRT, you pervs)) that would be different though.)

So, yeah. Society as a whole has slacked off, but I don't believe anyone has the right to tell anyone else what to wear in their cars, or the privacy of their homes for that matter. I'm not holding my breath waiting for Wal-Mart to adopt a no-pajamas policy either. They'd lose too much business. If the principal of that school in Belfast ever visited a Wal-Mart, he'd probably faint.

Union suits rock. That is all.

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